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Boys Don't Cry by The Cure

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If I pretend nothing happened then I can continue with my work without worrying of encountering Him again. Therapy is working as intended but some things still hurt, I can finally now be my real self with my boyfriend and I'm scared of hurting him, I know I'm fucked up and ill and I don't want to make him feel like shit, he means everything to me.
Lavander is frustrated with the world like I was when I started going outside of Moonrise, the world is not kind to her and I wish I could make it kinder, Keimin is feeling like shit and I can't help them if they don't let me, I have learn with time that if someone doesn't want help then I just can't do anything but assure them that I will lend them a hand the moment they feel ready. I know they are grieving, and I know work is taking a toll on them, I keep telling them that we can go on a vacation with some of their brothers but they insist on working and I don't know what to do, I told Markov about this and he said to me that he will try his best to help them... I haven't heard nothing ever since. I'm just worried and I feel shitty for worrying that much about everything, maybe I should invite Lavander, Shi and Juan somewhere, Lavander and Shi feel so isolated and I want to do something nice with my boyfriend, and he is also stressed about work, something like a double date? maybe we can go watch movies, I'll see what I can get my hands on.